Welcome to Denver, Partner

Hey there, fella! Glad to see yer finally awake. Yer lucky I showed up when I did. That gunslinger woulda pumped ya full o' lead if he'd had another second or two. I guess mah gunshot spooked ya, eh? Thought ya were the one wit' the new bullet-filled gut? Well, don't ya worry, feller; I made sure that fool trigger-head's already on 'is way to the mortician.

By the look of yer suit, the broken spectacles hangin' on yer nose, and yer amazin' way wit' people, I'd say yer new ta town. The fact that yer still layin' in the dirt has kinda clued me in, too. So gimme yer hand, and let me help ya up.

Anyhows, mah name is Ted Irvings, Slick to mah friends. I've been a deputee for the Denver Police Department for a couple weeks now, and happend ta stumble 'pon you layin' here. From the looks of it, I'd guess you just got off the latest Tinhorn Express, seekin' yer fame and fortune in the West.

Ya need ta tighten up yer guts, partner, if yer plannin' on makin' a stay of it out here. Denver's no place for the weak of heart. There are lotsa things ya don't know 'bout this here city that could end up gittin' ya kilt. Denver ain't the place it's made out ta be in the papers.

If ya thought that feller was bad, jus' wait 'til ya meet a few o' the locals.

All Rails Lead to Denver

Yer lookin' a little pale ag'in, mister. Don't worry; I'll git ya wherever yer goin' nice and safe-like.

The Denver House? I can git ya there in no time at all. If ya'd just follow me, we'll be thar in two shakes of a lambs tail.

Eh? Naw, the conductor musta givin' ya the wrong directions. It's over this way.

Well, now that we're on our way, lemme fill ya in on the real Denver. As the sayin' goes, "all rails lead to Denver." Never heard it? Ya must be behind the times, partner. Things out here are changin' faster than the time o' day. Fer the worse if'n ya ask me, and the railroad is just the beginnin'.

Colorado has been a big lure fer miners lookin' ta make 'emselves a fortune fer some time now, but it wasn't 'til recently that things really got outta hand. Ya see, since the Ghost Rock craze hit, Denver's become a bustlin' boomtown. Bein' 'bout as far west as ya can git by train, it's become the major stoppin' point between the East Coast and The Maze. Miners, gunslingers, scientists, teamsters; ya name it, and yer sure to find someone who fits the bill. These days, practic'ly everyone in the city is jus' passin' through. Trains are constantly zoomin' in an' out of the city, bringin' with 'em people and damn near anythin' else ya kin think of. Trouble 'cluded.

We've also been havin' our share of problems with the Injuns. The Souix 'ave been causin' trouble 'round here lately, and even the Reb's redskin lackeys occasion'ly git in on the action. Not ta say all o' 'em are bad, 'course, but I'd keep a keen eye on any that ya happen ta spot.

Then, 'course, there's the war. Denver's stuck betwickst the North and South, and both 'ave decided Colorado's theirs. The Union's got the power here, what with the Pinkertons and Marshalls, but the Rebs have been doin' their best ta keep the situation messy.

Thanks ta the army skirmishes and transients, Denver's gotten itself knee-deep in crime, violence and corruption. Us police do our best ta keep the situation under control, and the Marshalls and Pinkertons occasionally decide ta dirty their hands, too, but it's a losin' battle. Doesn't help that half the law is as bad as the crooks.

Speakin' o' shootouts, watch yer step; ya almost walked over 'ole Jeb Williams. The mortician woulda been none too pleased if ya'd messed 'im up any more than he already is. I'm surprised he didn't git 'im when he got yer buddy; Jeb never was one for personal hygene, but that smell is jus' a lit'l too much.

Aw, Schucks. There ya go lookin' sick ag'in.

The Silver Lining

It's not all bad, though. Denver's still one of the greatest cities I've ever been ta. There are plenty o' ways to make yerself some cash, you can find jus' 'bout anything your heart desires in the shops and on the streets, the entertainment scene is, well, entertainin', and, 'course, there's no better place than Denver ta hitch yerself a ride out West.

If cash is what ya need, jus' take yerself a look-see 'round the city. The Police Department kin always use some new deputees, if'n yer into that scene...which I'm perty sure you aren't. The rail barons are always lookin' fer some hard workin' fellas, as are the teamsters and cattle drivers. 'Course, there are also many more ways ta earn a livin' partakin' in the shadier side o' things, but, bein' a deputee and all, I'm not gonna git into that.

If goods n' services are what ya want, Denver's got it all. Hop Alley, Denver's Chinatown, has really grown over the last couple years, and is the perfect place ta pick yerself up imported goods or a bit o' the exotic. Then there's the various shops and businesses 'round town, all of which are sure ta have somethin' yer lookin' for...'specially if ya've got the cash or connections. The 'ole natorious black market's really thrivin' in Denver these days, and if ya can't convince a storekeep ta open up his storeroom fer ya, it's a sure bet ya kin find what yer lookin' for on the streets.

If I were ya, I'd go and git me some new eye-glasses, ta start.

As for excitement, there are more than enough saloons in Denver ta keep any man intoxicated fer a good, long time. Bar fights are, 'course, frequent, and guns are often fired...but at least it's all in fun. If small-time card games and darts jus' don't tickle yer fancy, the gamblin' halls are always eager ta reach into yer pockets.

Oh...what was the last bit I was gonna bring up? Ah, yes; travellin' West. The reason yer in Denver, I bet. Well, wagon trains are always takin' off this way and that, and most are more than happy ta take ya along with 'em. For a price, of course. Then ag'in, if ya happin' ta be plannin' yer own lit'l money-seekin' expedition, there are even more people lookin' ta find someone ta ride along wit'.

What did ya say? Ya want ta know 'bout the wierder stuff, eh? Well, if ya insist...

The Boy Who Cried Werewolf

There are more strange rumors 'bout things in an' outta Denver than I've heard most anywhere else. The Epitaph, that ammusin' tall-tale tellin' paper, 'as even decided ta set up shop downtown. I dunno what ya've read 'bout Denver in there, but there are some stories I've heard mahself that ya might be interested in.

Good 'ole Police Chief McCallin, shot down by a gang o' bank robbers a month or so ago, is said ta be back fer revenge, the ghost rock-powered train that decided ta blow up a few months back has been seen steamin' 'round outside the city, finishin' it's route, and there's always the big snakes that ranchers say keep eatin' their beef. Throw in stories 'bout hordes o' walkin' dead, monsterous grizzlies, and were-thingies, and ya've get yerself quite a jumpy buncha people.

My Lord! Behind you!

Oops. Didn't mean ta make ya faint. Guess I won't be doin' that joke agin' any time soon.

Epilogue

Anyone awake in thar? Hello? HEL- Oh, yer back.

I'd really 'preciate it if ya'd stop doin' this. Yer attractin' attention.

Anyhows, partner, we're almost there. I'm sure you'll be jus' fine handlin' yerself in Denver wit' all the knowledge I've learned ya today. Jus' remember the golden rule of survivin' in Denver; "never trust anyone."

Yeah, so ya've heard that one before. What can I say?

Now that ya've got yer balance back, jus' head on down that alley over there; the Denver House is right on the other side.

Don't worry, it's perfectly safe.

No, I didn't see any shadows moving down there.

Nor did I hear a gunshot. I think yer jus' lettin' yer imagination git ta ya.

What?

I take offense at that! Of course you can trust me; I'm with the law. Do ya think I would 'ave warned you 'bout not trustin' anyone if I wasn't ta be trusted mahself?

'Course not. Now git goin'.

And have a nice day.

Deadlands Denver

Preface
Welcome to Denver
Queen City of the Plains
Denver As It Is