I feel that one of the most telling distinctions between wargames (conflict simulations) and "German" style boardgames, even the ones that feel a little like wargames, is symmetry of player positions. At the start of a game of Settlers, for example, the board will have areas of different value (e.g., the 6-wheat versus the 3-wood), but no player has a distinct advantage over the others in acquiring it. You merely roll a die to see who selects first, and then there are other balancing mechanisms during the game.

Compare that to almost any wargame, where one side will have better units, or defensive terrain, or greater numbers, or superior command/control. These wargames aren't balanced in the same way--they often skew the victory conditions so that the more powerful side has to achieve a larger goal.

I've been playing German-style games for a few years now, and can't recall any that have that sort of asymmetry in their design, both in initial +layer balance and victory conditions. You might consider gamemaster-vs-players designs like Heroquest and Princess Ryan's Star Marines (though neither are German). Are there others I'm forgetting or have yet to play?