When running your auction, you have one goal in mind: to sell as many games for as much as you can get. I will show you how to do this.

1. Salting

The first thing to do is prepare the gaming public to receive your games well.

Have a few friends run small phoney auctions, selling the games to each other or fictitious people for ridiculous prices. You can make this seem more authentic by using the names ( ' or a close spelling) of legitimate, well known buyers.

At the same time have other friends post WTB (want to buy) ads offering large sums of cash for these same games. Once the new price level has been established, offer the games in your auction.

2. Physical Condition of the Merchandise

The condition of the games is very important. If a game is unpunched, then list it as "mint". If it's punched, list it as "punched- excellent". A game should never be listed in average or bad condition. The condition of the box is completely irrelevant because it's what's inside that counts (after all, you can't judge a book by its cover).

Put a disclaimer at the bottom: "All games complete to the best of my knowledge". But do not count the counters or components; this way, you are not lying when you sell an incomplete game.

If you know the game is missing counters, don't panic. Sell the game as complete, and add a few blanks (who will know the difference?) It's more difficult if a component such as a rule book or map is missing. But you can try and slip this one past the prospective buyer. At worst, he returns the game for a credit or refund. But if he doesn't catch the oversight in a week or so, he's out of luck. You can also stonewall him, or accuse him of losing the component!

Highlighting of the rules or separating cards does not detract from a game's mint status. Mint means unpunched counters.

3. Ground Rules Can Protect You

For each game list a ridiculously high buyout price. You can always claim it was sold at this price if you want to pull it.

List games you want to trade for that no sane person would ever consider, such as a mint War in the Pacific for a punched Rommel in the Desert and EastFront. You can always claim the trade was consummated.

Make up strange rules like: if a game doesn't excede the minimum in 7 of the first 15 days, it can be pulled.

4. Running the Auction

It's important for the auction to last long enough that prospective bidders see it, but not so long that they get bored. I suggest three to four weeks. Timing is important as you don't want to run an auction during the dead time after Christmas or during a very busy period. I recommend September and October.

To ensure a high price, make up bids under phoney names. Don't raise the bid too much, but make it seem a legitimate back-and-forth gradual raising of the price.

Never use the full email address of a bidder, because some unscrupulous seller may contact him directly. Make up some pretense about protecting the bidders from spambots stealing email addressess.

If no one bids for a game, then try again later. There is no harm in trying to milk the bidders.

If you are successful in raising a bidder's offer, but go too high and he lets the bogus bidder have it, contact him after the auction and say the winner won't reply to your email so you will let him have it for his last bid. Or if you suspect he won't take it, lower the winning bid a few dollars.

If you receive a higher bid after the winners are announced, take it. Tell the first winner the game was damaged upon your inspecting it. Or tell him you never got the check.

Make money on the postage. A dollar here and there adds up. Send everything by book rate, uninsured. And remember, too much packaging raises the shipping cost, and that comes out of your pocket!

A really gutsy thing to do is sell games that you don't even own! Sell multiple copies of mint War in the Pacific to may people and pocket the money. Tell them you forgot to insure it! Of course it will be impossible to use the same email address for future auctions, but use a different one. Have several bogus email addresses. This method can make one a lot of money, and besides, those who can afford to pay $100 or more for a damn game have too much money anyway.

You can even sell an incomplete game and then offer to sell the missing component from you "own" second copy for a nominal price. For example I once sold a copy of Empires of the Middle Ages for $80, but without the map. Then I offered to sell the map for another $30, thus netting $110 which was the "fair" price anyway. But for some reason, many buyers won't buy the extra component from you. Well, that's their loss. Besides you can have a third party contact them in a few weeks and offer to sell them the part they need.

6. Complaints

If they complain about the condition, turn the tables on them and get angry. Ask them what the hell they are complaining about! The mint copy Is unpunched after all, what does the fact that the rules are high-lighted have to do with any-thing? And if the game was punched or incomplete (i.e., excellent condition) tell them (shout at them) that you never said the game was complete. all you said w.as it was complete to your knowledge (of course, you didn't bother counting the pieces, but that's besides the point; you are being honest, you did not know that there were components missing).

7. Threats

Don't stand for it if a bidder threatens you. Threaten to expose his repeated backing out of auctions, and not sending the money he promised, even after you sent the games.

8. Buyouts and Trades

Buyouts and Trades are always allowed with no notice. But don't let the other player know this has happened. Agree to the sale/trade and continue the auction. If the game goes up enough, its probably worth breaking the trade/sale.

Remember, your word is you bond. The internet is based on trust so if you don't take advantage of these people, someone else will. You owe it to yourself to get the best price you can, and you are teaching these people a valuable lesson about life. Better that they should learn from a small unpleasant experience, than be swindled out of a large sum of money by a used car dealer or penny stock broker. For the next auction you simply use a new email address.

Ten Excuses for Breaking a Trade

1) I just discovered that it's missing [some component].
2) I just discovered that the [some component] is damaged.
3) The game is missing! I have it listed on my spreadsheet, but I can't find it!
4) I accepted the (ridiculously high) buyout.
5) I accepted a trade as specified in the wanted list (for a mint WitD).
6) The game didn't exceed the minimum in 7 of the first 15 days.
7) 1 just realized it's rny friend's copy; it's not my copy to sell!
8) You have been discourteous to me. I don't like you.
9) I have been warned about you, that you have not paid for games, and have backed out of auctions.
10) I never received your check.

How to sell Games on the Internet

Pay attention to auctions. If you see a game you want to sell, contact the bidders directly.

If you don't like the bidder, simply bid up the price and then back out when he stops raising the bid. He will get the game, but at a higher price. This can cost him a fair amount of money over time.

If you can forge email, you can get your competitor with the high bid to drop out of the auction on the last day.

Try sending checks that bounce. Chances are the seller will not wait until it clears. I suggest doing this for mid-priced games, as the seller may wait on big ticket items.

Don't stand for it if an auctioneer threatens you. Threaten to expose his acts of fraud, such as cashing your check and never sending the game. The people who sell a lot of games tend to be concerned about their reputations.

Don't worry about sorting monster games with 1200 pieces, let the buyer do that. I recommend keeping any plastic counter trays that are in book shelf games ... you may want them yourself, and since they weren't explicitly mentioned, the buyer shouldn't expect them. Just dump the counters in a single ziplock bag. To make some extra money, you can offer to sell some "extra" counter trays.

Monoceros is a well-known individual in the wargaming hobby who is eager to retain his status as grognard, and is not keen on being shot at dawn as a.fifth columnist or being shunned as a collaborator. This article was written with tongue firmly planted in cheek

I think -ed