Has this ever happened to you: You set up a game to play and do just that with a friend (or even solitaire). Midway through the game you see there is no way you'll ever succeed at making the game's victory conditions (or you are like me and didn't bother to look at them for the first half of the game...and just now decided to see how you were "doing"). Pity of it was, you were already having a great time with the game and your friend. What to do?

Well, you could do what some guys do. Say to hell with the game, quit, and look for something else to do. This deprives your opponent of (probably) a well-earned "thrill of victory" and yourself the fun of a good time with the game and your friend. Does that decision make sense to you? It doesn't at all to me, yet we've all seen it transpire.

The issue is something I've talked about in the past. What is the source of the fun in a good game? Winning or the Play? My contention years ago was that it was the play that did the trick. The momentary thrill of a "win" soon expires. If you feel that a win in a game confirms your moral and intellectual 'superiority' over your opponent, confirming that you are a winner and they are a loser, you've got other problems looking for help.

Alternatively, if you savor each moment of the game's play, you'll have hours of enjoying every twist of fate in the game (on both sides), be it your attack that goes sour or an enemy move so slick you want to remember it for next time. Just looking at the game and attempting to predict where it is going can be enjoyable itself. Likewise, trying to figure out what that mug across the table is up to can be a stimulating exercise. Given a good opponent, you can learn a lot just be seeing how he handles his troops and what he does in different situations.

Solitaire? No problem, simply play conservatively with most, but on occasion do something risky just to see if it really gums up the other side -- you might learn that some things you thought were risky really aren't and you'll learn the potentials of both sides.

Back to the game I mentioned where you realize (after the beer and pizza) there is no way for you to win according to the stated conditions. If your life revolves around beating 'Tim' every week, you'll pack it in and lose a good time. Otherwise, here are some thoughts to try: hit the game hard (no, not literally) and try to win anyway -- you might find you painted a grimmer picture of the situation than really existed. Or, recognizing that game defeat is inevitable, why not try to give 'the other guy' a real good show. Make him play hard to get that win; make it a good game for both of you after all. Maybe it's time 'Tim' had a chance to win.

As players, we sometimes forget that even if it looks like we won't get to win (this time), we still owe it ourselves and to the guys willing to put up with us to play a good game and have a good time. We owe that to each other.

So, What is Winning? I think it is a good time for all. The game is an interesting amusement brought to life for both sides by the enemy moving his troops in ways that you might not have, making both sides sweat an occasional mistake, and gloat an occasional coup. Sometimes we get too wrapped up in winning that five minute point totaling exercise at the end of the game that we forget to enjoy the journey. It is in the play of the game that the fun lives. It is our job, as players, to bring that fun out for ourselves and our friends.