I do not see the point of screaming about how lonely I am because my husband went out tonight to play wargames with a close friend. Maybe the reason you feel that way is that you never tried to be your spouse's partner for a night. I am lucky because I do not like to watch television after dinner and we live in the suburbs of Lisbon. It is too far to go to a cinema and be back early for the next day.

So, after dinner I have much time and a considerable amount of energy to spend in some new activity. It was this way, with much promotion from my husband's side, that I became his wargame partner.

It is now time to make some explanations. First, it was hard for my wargamer husband to know that I lived for a couple of years in Russia (I did my university studies there), and not have me playing Stalingrad Pocket with the correct pronunciation of the names of the Soviet HQs. Second, I had to revenge a personal affair of my Russian past; I almost failed my first examination on Soviet History because I could not remember how many Armor Divisions (Tankovyi Korpus) took part at Stalingrad (and other things besides). So, I went to the Soviet counteroffensive of 1942 with my brave Red Army ready to suffer the constraints of an inexperienced wargamer.

Of course, I do not think that it is necessary to live some time in Russia to begin playing wargames. You can have lived anywhere and feel that winning one or another scenario can revenge some episode of your past. It is true that I won a Minor Victory that time. (I did not understand the Victory Conditions and my husband did not bring them up! So, I failed a Major Victory.) You can simply have a feeling of revenge against those wargames about which your spouse is so proud. Any psychoanalyst would tell you that this is a correct way of managing your aggressive feelings.

I assure you that destroying your enemy's Panzer Divisions gives a more gratifying feeling than arguing against those little pieces of paper that can make your spouse absent. You must try. Who knows-maybe when they feel that it is a question of time they will behave unexpectedly. Your spouse might do the work so he can have you as his enemy for tonight: such as washing the dishes, cleaning the dining room, preparing things for next day, etc. It happened to me, so it is a possibility that you must have always in mind.

Thus, since we married, whenever we have time after dinner, we play. We play in our dining/playing room with a special table for cardboard. I was lucky when we began living together in what is now our apartment, and before was mine, to have enough room for those boxes and journals. So, I did not develop bad feelings against games. I have fun until the end of the day. I can enjoy the conquest of Tobruk in the middle of the African campaign.

You will see. After trying wargames, you will become aware of what they are about: recreating dramatic scenarios of war. You will have some of the feeling of driving an army into victory or defeat, and better understand the motivations of the generals and those of your spouse. You can feel like a general, and finally make your spouse understand that he married a hard-headed person.