"Sometimes I think war is God's way of teaching us geography." "A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit" - Army's magazine of preventive maintenance. "Aim towards Enemy" - Instruction printed on US Rocket Launcher When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend. Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs always hit the ground. It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed. Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never encountered automatic weapons. When in doubt, empty the magazine. If God had meant for us to be in the Navy, we would have been born with gray, baggy skin. Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo. You, you, and you... Panic. The rest of you, come with me. Odd objects attract fire - never lurk behind one. Incoming fire has the right of way. Don't look conspicuous: it draws fire. Tracers work both ways. Five second fuses only last three seconds. Who cares if a laser guided 500 lb. bomb is accurate to within 9 feet? Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the last, and don't ever volunteer to do anything. Never share a fox hole with anyone braver than you. Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid. If your attack is going well, you have walked into an ambush. Teamwork is essential. It gives the enemy someone else to shoot at. No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection. Make it too tough for the enemy to get in, and you can't get out. Any ship can be a minesweeper... once. Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do. The more you sweat in peace, the less you bleed in war. The enemy invariably attacks on one of two occasions: When you're ready for them and when you're not. Combat will occur on the ground between two adjoining maps. The side with the simplest uniforms wins. When you're short of everything but the enemy, you're in combat. Mines are equal opportunity weapons. If you find yourself in a fair fight, you didn't plan your mission properly. Back to Table of Contents -- Lone Warrior #140 Back to Lone Warrior List of Issues Back to MagWeb Magazine List © Copyright 2002 by Solo Wargamers Association. This article appears in MagWeb (Magazine Web) on the Internet World Wide Web. Other military history articles and gaming articles are available at http://www.magweb.com