I have played in about 5-6 campaigns in the last few years, and all but one has failed. That was the campaign in Bohemian Blitzkrieg using Age Of Reason rules. Why did it not fail? It had two players, both of whose styles of play and preferences were pretty much the same.

My first campaign of course failed due to one major reason, too many cooks around the pot. Everyone had to have their own personal preferences thrown into the game, and besides we were doing a Warhammer campaign. Wow, that was so long ago.

Anyhow, Now that I have matured to Historical gaining, our campaigns have tailed. I have made a list of the types of players that I really have encountered. Well not all of them. I know that you will recognize many of them and you may even be tired of reading Zany generalized list of the Types of gamers. I did stray once or twice from non campaign types. If you have any Ideas about campaigns that actually work please email me a reply. I'd love to hear all about it.

1 . The number cruncher. No matter how hard I try to limit the armies, this guy always seems to find a way to end up with nothing but grenadiers in every battle, or nothing but skirmishers that shoot and rim and shoot and run, etc. I mean you want to give the different armies dill' personalities and all, but if you do that this guy always picks the army that cheeses out with Swedish Grand Batteries in 1610.

2. The Lawyer. Not a rules Lawyer, but a real one.

3. The Ghost. Doesn't it seem that there is always that guy that runs Spain by proxy through his brother-in-law'?

4. The "FNG." Why is it that this guy is always your ally...at least he provides the excitement of you never knowing what lie will do next because he doesn't even know.

5. The rules writer. This guy wrote the rules and makes changes on the rules every time you get together for a campaign move. He also is never wrong about a rule, the reason should he obvious.

6. The Poltergeist. This is the guy who shows up the first day of the campaign , argues his case for several rules additions in his favor, and then never shows tip again, but threatens to even' week. lie usually gets a girlfriend right after the first campaign day.

7. The German-speaking rebaser. This guy finds a primary source proving that there was an extra 3 inches per man in formation and that the issue of a left shoe and right shoe proves that the formations were smaller so he rebases and insists that everyone else does the sane.

8. Mr. Faster-than-the-speed-of-light. The troops under his counters on the campaign map always seem to move 10's of 1000's at a time from one side to the other at unbelievable speeds. You would love to accuse him of cheating but his best friend is the club president.

9. Retro Boy. 'Ibis dude always seems to remember three turns later that lie forgot to fire his Grenadiers at your Grenadiers Flank, and oh yeah, he forgot to add in 3 fire factors. Also he forgot to move counter number 14 to A-12, so that means that this battle would have never happened in the first place.

10. Mr Multiperiod. "Damn, I play so many periods that I forgot how stupid it was to charge using this set of rules." This guy is always easy to beat.

11. The nester. sits in his capital and ... well that's about. it.

12. The Diplomat. This guy has deals and double deals with every player, and of course breaks any promise that he makes. "Hey help! Austria attacked me! Quick send the Russians in!" "Oop, sorry I can't if i do that then England will attack Denmark and then I will have to attack Italy, and Italy is giving me Money to Build a navy. I'll make you a deal though, send me 5000 troops to watch my border and I will loan you 10,000 thalers to train more troops and buy Mitre caps for your Grenadiers.

13. The S**thead. Why is it that there is always this guy that helps you measure your moves so you dont get that extra 1/16" that might win the game. He argues over every rule, shakes his knees the entire game, leans over and bends the bayonets on your figures, eats a hogie in the middle of the table, and pretty much brings with him all of the above 12 types to the game table. I always hook up with one of these guys every year or so and politely deal with them until the game is over, then avoid then like the plague.

14. The Milquetoast You know hum, lie is very pleasant and eager to please a joy to play with. He has probably been waiting for three months to get the chance to play. You have from noon til 6 p.m. to play but his wile shows up at three thirty all pissed off glowering, with some emergency, and gives you dirty looks, and generally fills the room with tension the consistency of Mustard Gas. poor guy. He always seems to dissappear after the first campaign day too.

15. Mr. Ping Pong ball. Sends out counters from his 100,000 troops 100 at a time.

16. Mr. Shut up and move your figures. This guy talks about obscure references, and home recipes for Chikoree tea for 4 of the 6 hours that you have to play.

17. The Old Dude. He always drives a Van load of rules books for campaigning that are older than dirt, or that are really obscure. If you are willing to slog through his library you can usually find something pretty cool though.

18. The Hothead. Okay this gut puts all his ducks in one basket, and goes for the Capital of his nearest neighbor. Half the time he gets stuck and wiped out on foreign turf, and the other Half he wins the campaign on turn two. "Gee this was a fun campaign, see ya next year."

19. "The History Buff' refuses to play with you because your British all have the sane facing colors.

20. "The Dreamboat" Somewhere out there is this player who is a pleasure to play with, is always ready to game at the drop of the hat, paints 50 figures an hour, is well dressed, already has the figs painted up for all of the largest battles in History, has every war film and documentary ever made on VCR tapes at home with the commercials edited out, and flies to every convention in the U.S. He is always on time and is eager to test out your new combat tables. Why if only one of you had breasts you would be married. If you see him around give him my email

Please have some fun with this little list and remember that all of the opinions expressed here are necessarily mine, and in every way reflect the opinions of me.